Why Won't Senpai Notice Me
by WwhiteWwixards
Summary: A tale about Roxy's undying affection for Eridan. EriRoxy. Contains the deep and sometimes painful truth about loving somebody. Strong language. References include JaneJake and DirkJake.


roxy laloned had a man crush on eradin ampra 4 a long tiem. Dey were awsum frands. Like bros. btu rxoy really had the hots 4 him.

okey so one day dirk n jane wur like, drooling ovur jaek. Dey just dint understnad y rxoy dint lurv him 2.  
"I just dunt understand!" drik sed.  
"i dnt either" jain sed.  
"we kood ask her y" drik sed  
"okey good pnal" jain sed.  
~~~

"rxoy y dzznt jaek maek ur kokoro go doki doki?" drik sed  
"he only has 2 kokoros goin dkoi doki. we wnat 3." jain sed.  
"jkae is a stoopid fag" rxoy sed. she dint look up frum her laptop. She wuz on teh pesterchum obviously.  
"gurl dat aint troo" drik did and did a z snap  
"rxoy hoo r u tlakin 2?" jain assdke.  
"eradin" roxy sed not looknig up.  
"rxoy r u guys frands" jane sed as her eyebrows wnet wild.  
"yiss" rxoy sed. Drik suddenly knoo she wuz onto sumtin  
"r u bset friens" jane asked.  
"yiss" roxy sed  
"doo u wnat teh dick" jain sed.  
"ohonhonhonhon~" diik lauhged teh frenchmen laff  
"nonono!" rxoy yelled  
"duz he wnat _your_ dick?" jain sed  
"nonono" rxoy groaned  
"i think u wnat teh dick" jain sed  
"nonono"  
"yes u doo"  
"no i dunt"  
"yiss u doo~~~! lmoa!" jain laffed  
"b-baka! No i dunt! LeAF MOI ALONE" rxoy creyed  
"wutevvah" dey sed n dey left. But dey knoo roxy wnated da dick. She was just pullen teh ol tsundere.  
~~~

drik sed "nonono jain we cnat jsut staop. we've got 2 gte her 2 cum kleen"  
"drik gooby plz spell dat diffrently" jain sed then added "omg check ur privelege"  
"nonono i 2 lehzeh" drik sed. dey both wnet bcka in2 rxoy's room.  
"if u dunt wnat his dick..." drik began, "then do u wnat his kokoro?"  
"hell yehs" rxoy sed "but senpai wnot notiss meh"  
"rxoy if u tlel him how u feel im sher he'll acept u" drik sed sympathetically

"nonono. lies." Rxoy sed.  
"rxoy eradin is liek forevver alone or some shit im sher he'll accept anythin at dis point"  
"nonono he still lurvs ferrari!" roxy sed  
"nonono he killed farrari" drik sed  
"oh. okey" rxoy sed  
"okey tlel him rite now on teh pesterchums" dirk sed  
"okey...but i has a promble. Ive bnee trynig 2 contact him 4 4 hours" rxoy sed  
"44 hours?" drik sed  
"nonono FOR 3 hours. Teh shitty riting uv dis fnafiction is confusing u" rxoy sed as she shruggued.  
"oh. so eradin iz not replynig?"  
"no. imma ask 1 of his frands if dey kno . mkay...ill ask ferrari" roxy sed  
"nonono i already tell you feraris ded" drik sed  
"oh yeah..." rxoy sed "ill jsut ask krakat"

-sumtin dat starts with a t and a g [tG] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] or some bullshit man fuck idk-

tG: krakat i need ur hlap  
CG: WHAT DO YOU WANT FUCKASS  
tG: u seen eradin enywhere  
CG: ERADIN? DONT YOU MEAN ERIDAN, YOU FUCKASS?  
tG: yes. Eradin.  
CG: NONONO FUCKASS JUST SPELL "ERIDAN." IT'S NOT THAT FUCKING HARD. EVEN A FUCKASS LIKE YOU COULD FIGURE THAT OUT.  
tG: i cnat. teh shitty riting of teh fnafiction wunt let moi  
CG: OH. WELL THEN.  
tG: btu srsly tho wheres eradin  
CG: KANAYA KILLED HIM EARLIER. THE FUCKASS HAD IT COMING.  
tG: wot  
CG: SHE CUT THE FUCKASS IN HALF WITH A CHAINSAW. IT WAS VERY FUN TO WATCH.  
tG: im cry  
-[tg] staoped pestrin CG or whatevus-

"OGM KANYA KILLED ERADIN!11!" rxoy sed drik n jain gaspued even tho jain had left earlier becuz she wnated 2 go look at hot yaoiz.  
"omg you srs?" drik sed  
"yehs!" rxoy sed  
"wait i read sumware dat u cna sew a cut in half fish back 2gether n it will come back 2 lyfe!" drik said even tho in ree life it make no sense and porbs isnt even possible.  
"OMG I KNO HOW 2 SEW!" rxoy sed.  
"yay" drik sed.

so dey wnet 2 where eraidn wuz killed. When rxoy saw teh dead eradin she threw up into a potted plant. Drik almost threw up 2 but dint becuz he swallowed it.  
"wlep," roxy sed while wiping teh vomit off of her face.  
"les get 2 wrok" roxy sed.  
"okay u do dat imma leave naow" drik sed as he made his way to da dore.  
"nope drik u gosta b my nurse!" roxy sed.  
"shit." Dirk sed.

After hours uv sewing an blood an vomit and rxoy attempting 2 mack on eradins ded face n dirk stopping her dey finally finished.  
"drik i has concern" roxy sed  
"wut" drik sed. just den eradin awoke. Btu his eyes wre jsut pure white tho.  
"wut the fuh y am i not ded anymoar?" eradin sed.  
"bkuz we saved u!" rxoy sed. suddenly jaen wlaked in. btu then she walked back out becuz da scene wuz gross.  
"im gonna leave naow. All dis blood n shit is down rite disgusting." Drik sed. so he left.  
"eradin cna i mack on ur face" roxy sed  
"nonono" eradin sed n he left.  
"why wont senpai notice me?" roxy cryed. Suddenly eradin walked back in.  
"lawlz jk jk xD xD xDDD lmao jk!1" he sed.

...  
And then they fucked!


End file.
